Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Letting Go

     It's always difficult to let go.  My grandmother's illness has taken a turn for the worse. Her steps are getting shorter and her breathing is becoming shallow. No matter how much medicine she takes and how many doctor's appointments she has, her body is tired.  And it is ready to stop fighting.  My grandmother is ready to go.  She now speaks of being tired, seeing her deceased husband and transcending to heaven.  She tells me to stick with your family and love each other.  There is something final in the words she speak.
      She used to talk about planting her garden for the summer.  She no longer talks about that anymore.  She also used to talk about her friends.  These days most of her friends have passed away.   She talks about how much she misses her parents and older brother. Grandma wishes she could see them once more. Hear their laughter and see them smile. Just to sit together once more and savor their company. She  remenance about their childhood and migrating from the South to the North.
     Letting go is not easy.  I want to be selfish and say, "Grandma, you said you would live to be 100. You have to stay four more years." But instead I say, "Grandma, I love you," as I give her a bath, lotion her up, shake talc powder on her back and french braid her hair. Letting go is hard to do. When you've had a constant person with you for so long.  It's OK to let go Grandma.  You've had a full life and brought joy and love to many people.  Close your eyes and let go.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Halloween is Almost Here

    It's a couple of days before Halloween and I am excited.  I really shouldn't be all that excited that should be left for the kids.  But I love to see the little kids all dressed up and running around looking for Tricks or Treats.  These days alot of parents do not allow their children to go trick or treating.  I can understand why.  The world is not as innocent for children as it used to be. You have to watch your children all the time.  So instead of going trick or treating there are different ways you can celebrate.
     Many families have chosen to take their children to the local malls to collect candy.  Usually there is some type of Halloween program in which the kids can participate.  They have costume competitions and prizes are given.  The children then go to each store to collect goodies from the vendors or retailers.  I like this venue because it gives adults an excuse to window shop or actually shop at the same time.
     An alternative to going to the mall is attending a church activity.  More churches and religious organizations are offering ways to celebrate Halloween without the secular traditions.  For example, at my church they are having a pumpkin patch picking.  A farmer is going to attend and show the children how to carve the pumpkins.  When the demonstration is over, the church will pass out treats to the kids.
     Lastly, some parents are having Halloween parties and inviting the neighborhood children over.  This give the parents an excuse to really decorate their homes and show off the creativity skills for the children in the neighborhood.  Did I say the children in the neighborhood? I really meant to say show off their talents for the adults.  No matter how you choose to celebrate or not celebrate.  It's a great excuse to get  together with families, friends and acquaintances to enjoy life, laugh and have fun.  And everyone needs a little bit of fun in  their  lives.

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Friday, October 15, 2010

A Trip Down Memory Lane

For the past couple of days I have been spending time with my grandmother.  She is 96 years old and is experiencing Alzheimers disease.  Alzheimers disease is genetic in my maternal heredity.  Most of my grandmother's sisters and brothers developed Alzheimer's disease during their senior years.  Expect for one sister that experienced  the disease early in life.  Now when I visit my grandmother it is more of a reversal role.  My grandmother was my real parent from the time I was 12 years old until I went off to college when I was 18 years old. She did all the things that grandmothers do like teach me how to make southern dishes from scratch, sew, garden and cut the grass. She also spoiled me very much.  Hence my narcissistic personality. 
Alzheimer's is a very treacherous disease it robs people of the memories they have created over a lifetime.  It takes away your ability to recognize the most important people in your life.  And it hurts all the family members who used to be called baby, sweetheart and dear.  Those are the words that soothed you when you were feeling alone in the world, gave you comfort when you needed love that only a spouse or parent could give you.  In turn you become the comforter and solace with the person suffering from Alzheimers.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

It's July in October

For the past couple of days the weather here has been incredible! It's been between 70 to 80 degrees.  I can't believe how much Chicago feels like Los Angeles.  Yes, I said Los Angeles.  We took advantage of this weather by going to the beach and watching fireworks.  That's right fireworks in October.  Maybe we'll get great weather for Christmas.  We can always dream.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

It's a Hairy Situation: He Died Too Young

It's a Hairy Situation: He Died Too Young

It's a Hairy Situation: He Died Too Young

It's a Hairy Situation: He Died Too Young: "Image via Wikipedia Today a childhood friend of mine passed away. It saddened my heart. He was such a great person. He could sing, ..."

He Died Too Young

Hamburg Steinway D-274Image via Wikipedia
       Today a childhood friend of mine passed away.  It saddened my heart.  He was such a great person.  He could sing, play the piano and was a great speaker.  He truly used all of his God-given talents.  He was special like that.  I remember going to church and hearing him playing the piano and seeing him direct the choir.  He had such a great gift.  It sometimes makes you realize how precious life it.   You can be here today and gone within a blink of an eye.  Death  gives you more perspective on life.  We are always complaining about what we don't have, what we need more of, what we can do to be better.  It just seems as if nothing is never enough for anyone.  If we knew exactly when we were going to leave this Earth I imagine we would live differently.
       Many people would actually slow down and enjoy life more.  I hope they would actually take time to smell the flowers, spend more time with loved ones and friends and try to make the world a better place.  I know I would definitely do somethings that I have been putting off.  You know how you say, "I'll do it some other time.  It can wait." But should it have to wait.  We should all seize the moment and do the things and enjoy the experiences we've always promised we would to.  Because as we all know tomorrow is not promised.  Life is not measured by how long you live, but how well you live.  No one wants to die young, but if you leave this Earth living like there was no tomorrow you will not have any regrets.
         I am truly saddened by my friends death.  However, he lived doing what he loved.  He brought beauty and light into the world with his music and his songs.  He was blessing to anyone who knew him.  Phillip G. Freeman.
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